Chappell Roan remains candid about her rapid rise to fame and its effects on her mental health.
In a Guardian interview published on Friday, September 20, the Missouri native revealed that she goes to therapy twice a week — while also admitting that she recently received a shocking diagnosis from her psychiatrist.
“She diagnosed me with severe depression – which I didn’t think I had because I’m not actually sad,” she told the outlet. However, her symptoms — brain fog, memory issues, inability to focus and “a very lackluster viewpoint,” suddenly made more sense after she was diagnosed.
In her conversation, she also reflected on how her depression stems from the fact that her “whole life has changed.”
Although Chappell’s dreams are finally coming true after 10 long years in the music industry, she’s been honest about how she has been grappling with the challenges that come with fame, such as the backlash she’s received for setting necessary boundaries with fans.
“I’m very turned off by the celebrity of it all,” she said of her newfound stardom. “Some girls have been in this so long that they’re used to that, but I’m not that girl. I’m not gonna be a sweetie pie to a man who’s telling me to shut the f–k up,” she said, referring to her viral VMAs paparazzi moment. “They think I’m complaining about my success. I’m complaining about being abused.”
She also revealed that now, everything she really loves to do “comes with baggage.”
“If I want to go thrifting, I have to book security and prepare myself that this is not going to be normal,” she said. “Going to the park, Pilates, yoga – how do I do this in a safe way where I’m not going to be stalked or harassed?”
Chappell also revealed that “every time I walk through my front door” she starts to cry. “It just comes out of me,” she said. “I can’t even help it, I just start sobbing and either being so angry at myself for choosing this path, or grieving how the curiosity and pure wonder I had about the world is somewhat taken away from me.”
While Chappell describes her experience of fame as a process of grief, she is also committed to leveraging her platform for positive change. As reported by The Guardian, £1 from every ticket sold for her U.K. tour will benefit the LGBTQ+ charity Kaleidoscope Trust.
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