It’s been one year since Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth shocked the world by announcing that they were getting a divorce. Now, the singer has opened up about her split from the actor, and she admitted that she “lost herself” during their relationship.

As fans know, the 27-year-old did not keep it a secret that her 2017 track “Malibu” off her album Younger Now was about the Hunger Games star. But looking back, she said those songs did not feel authentic to her.

“When I look at my career, there was really a two year or one year period that doesn’t really make sense. I think you and I probably know that it has to do kind of with that more like Younger Now, kind of ‘Malibu’ era,” she explained during a new interview with MTV. “I think what happened in that, which does happen to a lot of people, and it’s not to villainize the partner, but you lose yourself in someone else sometimes.”

As fans know, just days after news hit the web that the two stars had broken up after almost 10 years together, the Hannah Montana alum was spotted kissing Kaitlynn Carter. And a few weeks after that, she entered into a relationship with Cody Simpson. But according to the “Wrecking Ball” songstress, she felt “villainized” for “moving on” so quickly.

“Obviously I went through an extremely public breakup and, even more than that, a divorce, and with someone that I had been with for 10 years. I felt kind of villainized. I also felt like I kind of shut down because it was kind of, respectfully, below me to engage with the press and the media at that time,” she explained while speaking on Zane Lowe‘s Apple Music podcast, adding that instead, she put her feelings into her music. “It felt like I would rather be able to articulate this experience in a poetic way that also I can put back into my art. I never really have engaged. I’ve only played with the public and the perception in that way.”

The former Disney star also opened up about the experience while speaking on the “Call Her Daddy” podcast, and she admitted that losing Liam felt “like a death.”

“I had a very public, very big breakup that was a 10-year span of a relationship. I tried not to get lost in the emotion… It’s like a death when you lose a loved one, it’s that deep. It feels like a death,” she revealed. “Honestly, sometimes [death] even feels easier because [with a breakup] the person is still walking on the earth.”

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