In case you haven't noticed, we love Cole Sprouse. We loved him back in his Suite Life of Zack and Cody days with Dylan by his side. We loved him back in his NYU days when we low-key stalked his adventures away from stardom. We love him as Riverdale's bizarrely dreamy best boyfriend ever, Jughead Jones. But the place we love him the most is Twitter where, incidentally, he spends a lot of his time shading himself.
Why? Well, he's weird. He's a weirdo. He doesn't fit in. Or, no, more eloquently put, Cole just happens to be effing hilarious in that Jughead-esque, self-deprecating way (or wait, is Jug actually Cole-esque?). And while yes, occasionally he and Dylan will both drag each other and their formerly sweet Suite life, Cole is usually best when he's poking fun at himself specifically.
Scroll down to see just a few times a Cole Sprouse on Cole Sprouse roast left us in hysterics.
1. When he acknowledged he could be the worst kind of internet commenter.
I'm the guy who posts "first" on all your tweets.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) April 17, 2017
But would he do it on YouTube? Because that would be unforgivable.
2. When he put his best face forward.
Photographer captured a photo after they told me I was beautiful. pic.twitter.com/lUQ54HKpSJ
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) January 27, 2017
Too pure for this world.
3. When he came out of retirement FOR THE FANS.
I only started acting again so you guys wouldn't feel like you wasted money on the posters of me at 12.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) April 2, 2017
Obvi he had to stay relevant so we could hang onto our Suite Life fold-outs forever.
4. When he felt personally victimized by Google.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) June 16, 2017
It's bad enough being mistaken for Dylan all the time, but IMDB won't let him shake off his (timeless, immortal, iconic) role as Cody Martin.
5. When he threw it back to his days on the streets.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) October 3, 2016
Nobody was as thug.
6. When he wasn't sure his younger self was worth trusting.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) May 18, 2016
It's important info nonetheless.
7. When he assured everyone he had grown into a capable young lady.
I'm not that little girl from Disney anymore. I'm a full grown woman now.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) July 24, 2016
Isn't she lovely?
8. When he failed this quiz with flying colors.
"Haha this should be fun." pic.twitter.com/sOhBIxt9DY
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) July 11, 2017
Although Cole Sprouse wouldn't think Cole Sprouse is cool.
9. When he was haunted by the past.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) March 24, 2017
Lookin' straight outta Holland right there.
10. When he was feeling single AF.
McDonald's valentines menu sucks tbh. Looks like my cats and I will take our business elsewhere.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) February 14, 2017
But oh, if we could only be one of Cole's cats.
11. When he was legit possessed.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) May 18, 2014
V v concerned.
12. When he crowd sourced his new look.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) March 18, 2014
Go get all the roles.
13. When he validated his life's purpose on Twitter.
Let me make you laugh but only because I'm so uncomfortable 😀
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) December 12, 2015
He suffers for his art.
14. When he gave a shout-out for all the girls who thought he was a hard pass during the Disney Channel era.
You thought this puberty was good, wait until you see me after my ~second puberty~
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) December 2, 2015
Although for real tho we couldn't imagine what another puberty could do for him. ?
15. When he showed that some bonds are unbreakable.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) August 7, 2015
16. When he assured people you could go to him for election advice.
Why form your own political opinions when you can just listen to completely unqualified celebrities #LikeMyself?
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) July 31, 2016
Cole understands that you should vote based on your favorite Disney Channel star's personal preference.
17. When he reminisced about being a little creep.
Nightmare guest star. pic.twitter.com/8zjsYdprwZ
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) September 8, 2016
18. When he had hot weekend plans.
trying to look like I'm not going right back home on a Friday night. pic.twitter.com/431Wv6CD39
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) October 24, 2015
Really the best actor of our generation.
19. When he entered the real world.
I'm so glad that my transition from college student to meme has been only kinda painful.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) January 28, 2016
Clearly Cole has made the switch from child star to serious actor with grace.
We ❤️ you.
— Cole M. Sprouse (@colesprouse) July 22, 2016