Since her whirlwind rise to fame, Billie Eilish‘s fashion choices have been a major point of conversation. It’s no secret the “Bad Guy” songstress has been pretty open about the fact that she chooses to wear oversized clothing so that people can’t sexualize her, but that hasn’t always been the reason. Initially, “the only reason I did it was [because] I hated my body,” the 18-year-old recently admitted to Dazed magazine.
Throughout the interview, the songstress also remembered a time when she decided to stray from her usual fashion choices, and the immediate backlash she received after photos of her wearing a fitted tank top hit the web.
“I saw comments like, ‘How dare she talk about not wanting to be sexualized and wear this?!’” she explained. “It was trending. There were comments like, ‘I don’t like her any more because as soon as she turns 18 she’s a whore.’ Like, dude. I can’t win. I cannot win.”
Billie went on to get real about her body insecurity struggles and how she learned to accept what she looks like.
“There was a point last year where I was naked and I didn’t recognize my body ’cause I hadn’t seen it in a while. I would see it sometimes and be like, ‘Whose body is that?’” the singer said. “It’s not that I like [my body] now, I just think I’m a bit more OK with it.”
She continued, “If I wore a dress to something, I would be hated for it. People would be like, ‘You’ve changed, how dare you do what you’ve always rebelled against?’ I’m like, ‘I’m not rebelling against anything, really.’ I can’t stress it enough. I’m just wearing what I wanna wear. If there’s a day when I’m like, ‘You know what, I feel comfortable with my belly right now, and I wanna show my belly,’ I should be allowed to do that.”
As fans know, this candid interview came just a month after Billie addressed the trolls who hate on her clothes and the way she looks with a video interlude during her since-postponed Where Do We Go world tour. In the clip, Billie stripped down and as she removed her clothing, she said “You have opinions about my opinions, about my music, about my clothes, about my body. Some people hate what I wear, some people praise it. Some people use it to shame others, some people use it to shame me. But I feel you watching always and nothing I do goes unseen. So while I feel your stares, your disapproval or your sigh of relief, if I lived by them I’d never be able to move. Would you like me to be smaller? Weaker? Softer? Taller? Would you like me to be quiet? Do my shoulder provoke you? Does my chest? Am I my stomach? My hips? The body I was born with is not what you wanted? If I wear what is comfortable, I am not a woman. If I shed the layers, I’m a slut.”
If you or someone you know needs help, please call the National Youth Crisis Hotline at 1-800-448-4663.
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