Although YouTuber Tana Mongeau opened up about her mental health in a heartfelt video posted back in December 2019, there’s still more to the story. On Tuesday, March 31, the 21-year-old admitted that she “hated” filming the second season of her MTV reality show No Filter because she was in the “darkest” place of her life. Tana told viewers during an hour-long video that, at the time, her depression had gotten so bad that she “didn’t care” if she lived.
As fans know, the second season of the reality series has been met with many criticisms online due to Tana’s actions. For those who missed it, people on social media slammed the influencer for the way she treated her manager Jordan Worona. Plus, some called her “rude” after it appeared that she didn’t take her asthma diagnosis seriously. During her most recent upload, Tana addressed the hate and explained that the show was edited to portray her in a way that “isn’t exactly like how I act on a day to day basis.” She reminded fans that each episode of the reality show is a “dramatic and interesting” edit of multiple hours of filming, which she knew going into the project.
In another part of the video, Tana explained that when it came to filming Season 2, she didn’t even want to do it. The only reason she ended up agreeing was because she wanted to tell her story in the most “brutally honest” way.
“If me struggling physically and mentally is filmed, I’m fine showing that to the world if there’s a message behind it,” she explained. “I sat down with MTV and had these conversations, and we all kind of came to the conclusion that that’s what Season 2 would be about. It would be about the journey of me to better myself mentally and physically.”
Tana’s super honest YouTube video came just a few days after she dragged MTV on Twitter, claiming that they failed to show her true feelings and made it look like she didn’t “care about” anyone in her life. She acknowledged this and said that she had actually filmed confessionals for the show where she said she cared about all her friends more than she cared about herself, which is just one of the reasons that she was upset with how the show was being edited.
“I hate that I filmed the show at such a bad time, when I wasn’t being nice all the time. I hate who I was at the time shooting the show. I wish that footage wasn’t out there, and I wish I didn’t give anyone the opportunity to edit me like that,” she admitted.
Before she concluded, Tana said she knows that the rest of the season is still going to air and regrets filming it during the “darkest time” of her life.
“I did it in hopes of it being something that could help people. I still hope that it eventually turns out that way. If it doesn’t there’s nothing I can do except say this kind of stuff and move on,” she said. “I hope people take what I’ve said as my truth.”
If you or someone you know is in emotional distress or considering suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
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